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What do you get when a king farts? Noble gas!
Shoutbox
 Yes indeed, I've been known to call girls wind-bags - ;) - don't shoot, me jokie...
The janitor at my job keeps asking me to smoke weed with him, but I turned him down. I can't deal with high maintenance people.
 Munch and ARM, I'm pretty hard to offend...I might be a woman but DO have a sense of humor!
I was lonely until I glued a coffee cup to the top of my car. Now everyone waves at me.
Life is too short to be serious all the time. So, if you can't laugh at yourself, call me... I'll laugh at you.
We must all do our part for the planet. I’ve just unplugged a row of electric cars that no one was using.
Man: Two years ago, my brother ran for Congress. Friend: What does he do now? Man: Nothing, he got elected!
The fitness trainer asked me, “What kind of a squat are you accustomed to doing?” I said, “Diddly.”
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