I tried to come up with a carpentry pun that woodwork. I think I nailed it, but nobody saw it.

If one door closes and another door opens... your house is probably haunted.

:)

Never criticize someone until you have walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you'll be a mile away, and you'll have their shoes.

I was once kidnapped by mimes. They did unspeakable things to me.

roflm ask off ARM :)

I'd make a swear jar, but I don't have the kind of income to keep up with my mouth.

How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.

What's better than daffodils on your piano..? - - - Tulips on your organ...

Why are so many blonde jokes one-liners? So brunettes can remember them.

Here I sit, all broken hearted, came here to shit but only farted. Port a John humor.

glad to hear :)

LOL - the weeding never ends - but my Zen is restored...

reiki-ing the garden, lol.

???

Are you done yet?

Always happy to rake or reiki the garden...

There's always someone who wants to mess with my Zen - LOL

Didn't take long for someone to screw that up I see.

Ban Lifted early - I'm in a good and hopeful mood - LOL..